I went to the market to purchase the lobster.
Immediately i was not looking at the size, type or price, as I would usually do as a cook, but now i was picking a personality. I knew they would all die eventually, but still I felt uncomfortably powerful. I bought one, 15 euros, a good price. I carefully placed him in my backpack, wrapping a wet towel around him. This way he would be more comfortable. The humid towel would keep him cool, and because he was kept from daylight he would think it was night-time and be less active. I unwrap him in my kitchen; the creature’s claws are strapped. Making him less dangerous to me, but also making it an unfair fight.
He doesn’t seem to protest. I’m uncomfortable knowing what will happen, while the lobster seems to be exploring his new environment. I gently put the knife just behind his skull, force my weight on the knife and push down rapidly. A clean death, over within seconds. The tension I felt before the cut immediately fades away. It's over. It went well. I feel no guilt, and as soon as I put the lobster on the grill, the creature becomes a meal.